Jellyfish attack!

Yesterday I snorkelled with my sister. I spotted what I thought was a big, flowery lump of coral or something, floating in the water. As I approached, I realised it was man's natural enemy -- the jellyfish. As wide as a dinner plate, this beast was pulsing confidently through the water, searching for small fish or mammals to feed on. Either it had evolved to look like coral, so it could hunt better -- or this was a particularly cunning jellyfish who was carrying around a chunk of coral and whistling casually. In the same way a cartoon character will hide inside a bush with just his feet sticking out the bottom, this jellyfish was using the camouflage to sneak up on people! Dastardly!

Being the seasoned snorkeller's that we are, we of course stayed a few meters away from this great beast. But before we could warn them, it had floated into the midst of three guys in full wetsuits and high-vis snorkelling gear! These clowns were obviously out for "a good time", and weren't aware of the dangers that lurk just below the surface. I watched with morbid fascination as the tentacles of the great fish brushed against the chest of one. His head was above the water! How could he be so unaware of the attack happening just inches below his face?! His friend noticed, and desperately warned him, and the trio made a quick escape. But if it wasn't for his thick wetsuit, this poor soul would have been quickly paralysed by the stinging tentacles, and sunk beneath the waves to drown. And eventually be consumed by the jellyfish.

A similar sort of thing happens on Ski slopes(*). At the start of the season, the locals will see groups of cashed-up morons walking around in $900 ski jackets, carrying $4,000 skis -- but none of it saves them from breaking their legs when they hit a tree. Gear doesn't make you safe -- experience does. Please try to remember this.

Also, my sister claims to have seen a school of "swordfish". I highly doubt this dubious sighting, which conveniently happened while I was out of the water. Swordfish have been extinct for over 50 years! But some people don't want to hear "facts"; more likely, she saw her own shadow cast against the sea bed.

Anyway, it goes to show you -- after 20+ trips to this beach, I am still seeing new and cruel dangers, just waiting to claim the unwary swimmer.

Stay alert out there!

-Gray

* Disclaimer: I have never been skiing. This article is purely conjecture on my part.